Connecting Birth Mothers and Their Stories
By Adrian Collins
On Saturday, May 12th, Hope’s Promise hosted its 9th annual Birth Mother Coffee and Connection at Castle Oaks Covenant Church in Castle Rock, Colorado. The afternoon event centered around connecting birth mothers and honoring their decision to place a child for adoption. This year’s theme, “Seeing the Beauty in Brokenness” was woven throughout the special occasion.
After guests enjoyed coffee and light refreshments, the event began with introductions. Some birth mothers were accompanied by the adoptive moms of their children, while others brought a female family member or special friend to the event. Birth mothers came from all different walks in their adoption journey; some were new birth moms, making an adoption plan for their child only one year earlier, while some had placed over twenty years ago. Regardless, birth mothers all shared one commonality; each had made a sacrificial decision out of love for their child.
“Being a part of this event is beyond my expectations,” said Margarita, a birth mom of an eight-year-old daughter. “It solidifies my decision to make an adoption plan and helps build relationships with others who made the same tough choice.”
Margarita joined her friend and fellow birth mother, Charla, along with the adoptive mom of both of their children, Kristen Hutchins.
“We make an entire weekend out of this event,” Kristen said. For the past nine years, Kirsten, Charla and Margarita have dedicated the same weekend to bond over shared dinners, patio chats and the Hope’s Promise Birth Mother Coffee and Connection.
“I never imagined an open adoption could be this beautiful,” Margarita said.
“We love each other and take care of one another,” Charla said, a birth mom to an eleven-year-old son, “We are like an extended family.”
After introductions had been made, Katherine, a birth mom and intern at Hope’s Promise, shared her adoption story and led the group through a craft to demonstrate God’s grace and mercy in the midst of pain and brokenness.
As the ladies sorted through fragments of colorful broken plates and laid them on bricks, Katherine shared how she’d felt broken during her pregnancy and the subsequent days following the relinquishment of her son. Next the group covered the entire brick with grout, filling in the spaces between the pieces of broken plates. Using a white towel, the ladies removed the grout from around the plate pieces to reveal a lovely pattern, each one unique, but distinctly beautiful.
Katherine explained, “God fills in the cracks to make our brokenness beautiful. You have the power to live with God’s grace.”
The song, “Clean” by Christian artist Natalie Grant played softly in the background as guests said their goodbyes and took a small box of chocolates with handwritten notes, donated by caring members of Plum Creek Community Church, a partner of Hope’s Promise. As birth mothers and their guests carried home their bricks of remembrance, Katherine’s words lingered for all. “You are loved and beautifully broken.
Adrian Collins writes about the real-life complexities of being both a birth mother and an adoptive mother. She is a full-time homeschooling mom of five children; one daughter who was placed for adoption at birth, one son adopted at birth, and three biological sons. Adrian has been a mentor to birth moms who choose an adoption plan for their children, as well as a speaker, and bible study leader for new moms. She studied journalism at Point Loma Nazarene University in San Diego and has a deep-rooted love of classic literature. Married to her high school sweetheart for twenty-one years they currently reside in Castle Rock, Colorado. When she’s not teaching or writing, Adrian is actively pursuing her goal of visiting all U.S. National Parks with her kids. Adrian is working on her first memoir about hope and healing through the journey of adoption.