Blog
2024
FTC Warns Adoption Intermediaries Against Misleading Parents
Facilitated adoptions are also sometimes called “intermediary adoptions” or “adoption intermediaries” Instead of using an agency to match potential adoptive parents with birth parents choosing adoption, the adoption is facilitated by someone other than an adoption agency, usually a for-profit business that isn’t licensed and has no oversight or accountability. Hope’s Promise is proud to be a full-service adoption and child welfare agency. We provide extensive and ethical options counseling to help expectant parents understand all of their options. We continue to provide resources to expectant parents who choose to parent as well as counseling and monthly birth mother support groups when a woman chooses to make an adoption plan for her baby. Our support doesn’t end when the baby is born.
What are adoption intermediaries telling you?
By: Jim Kreidler, Consumer Education Specialist
Federal Trade Commission
If you search online for “adoption agencies near me,” you might see a lot of ads for adoption intermediaries, which might give you the impression that these businesses are state licensed, full-service adoption agencies. But are they?
Today, 31 adoption intermediaries — for-profit businesses claiming to match adoptive parents with birth parents in private adoptions for a hefty fee — got letters from the FTC. These businesses may be breaking the law if they say they’re a licensed adoption agency when they aren’t, make promises they can’t keep, or try to prevent people from posting honest reviews.
If you’re interested in private adoption:
Do your research. Adoption can be a complicated process to navigate. Know that unlicensed adoption intermediaries — sometimes called advertisers, facilitators, or brokers — are not licensed adoption agencies. That means they’re not supervised by their state or bound by its educational, social work, or legal training requirements. If you’re looking for a licensed adoption agency, contact your state department of health and human services for a list.
Consult a lawyer or your state’s adoption resources. Adoption laws vary widely by state, including the amount of time birth parents have to change their mind and how the law handles agreements for open or closed adoptions. Also, even if an adoption provider is licensed in one state, it may not be allowed to work with birth parents or place children in other states.
Check out who you plan to work with. Choosing an adoption provider is a significant decision. Understand what services they do and don’t offer and what their fees cover. Review online complaints, ask for recent references, and check with your attorney general’s office for information about any legal actions.
Spot an unfair or deceptive business practice? Report it to the FTC at ReportFraud.ftc.gov.
2024
Why We Discontinued Child Sponsorship
by Colleen Briggs, Hope’s Promise, Director of Orphan Care
Child sponsorship is a well-known fundraising model in the realm of international childcare programs. We opened our oldest existing program in Kenya in 2006 through funding generated by child sponsorship.
On the plus side, donors connected to a child’s story and felt personally invested in the child’s wellbeing. Theoretically, the child would be encouraged and uplifted by having a “friend” on the other side of the world who prayed for and invested in their life. And the sponsor would be impacted by learning about the way of life in the child’s country.
But through the years, we stumbled experientially into unintended consequences of child sponsorship for the orphaned children we serve.
For these kids, who have lost the most important attachment in their lives when one or both parents died, their most important task for long term holistic wellbeing is to experience God’s love through attachment to a new caregiver and not to a stranger on the other side of the world.
We began to experience the complications of a funding model that conflicted with program goals when some of our Kenyan kids reached their early teens in Kenya and told their parents, “I don’t have to listen to you because I have a sponsor in the US. “
A particularly poignant experience brought the dissonance to the forefront in 2019 when a Connection Trip team from the US visited a Hope’s Promise family in Vietnam. We took backpacks for each child we planned to visit, filled with standardized items we’d collected from multiple sponsors. Following our direction, a child sponsor on the team presented a backpack to her sponsored child. When the little girl climbed on the sponsor’s lap to open the bag, the nonverbals of her parents needed no translation. Their expressions held a mixture of happiness for the child’s excitement, but also a wistfulness and sadness. We realized in that moment how strange it would, as a parent, if a stranger who had financial influence over my child brought gifts I could not afford.
That was the tipping point. We immediately switched tactics. For the rest of the trip, we gave the kids’ backpacks to the parents privately to distribute later, if and when they wanted. We shared photos of the backpacks and the families with our sponsors, but not photos of the children with the gifts.
Then, in 2020, with Phil Aspegren’s input, we took the plunge and switched funding models completely. A quote from him became our guiding principle: “sell your impact, not your kids.” We decided it was time to fully acknowledge and course correct the incongruence in our funding model and program goals.
We undertook a year-long process, contacting over one hundred child sponsors directly and personally through email and phone call. We described why we were changing models and invited their input. We amended how we described our new funding model several times based on their feedback. However, they expressed unanimous support for the heart of the changes.
We still collect reports on each child in our program, because it’s just good social work. But, instead of “child updates,” we now share “impact reports” with our donors, including stories we’ve selected that protect dignity and privacy and celebrate potential.
Here is how we describe our new model on our website:
Child Sponsorship Reimagined
Traditionally, child sponsorship cultivates a relationship between a child in need and a benevolent stranger in another country. However, global orphan care research reveals that when a child loses one or both parents, what they need most is God’s love expressed through a new caregiver and family. Sometimes a relationship with someone far away, especially someone who is known to support them financially, can distract a child from learning to trust and attach to their family.
So, imagine with us a new kind of “child sponsorship,” designed specifically for the needs of an orphaned child’s heart. Imagine an investment that stays behind the scenes, invisible to the child but nonetheless essential to the family’s success. Imagine a new way of supporting a child by shining the spotlight on his or her family.
Although Hope’s Promise children may never know your name, when you become a family champion, you become a catalyst for transformation in their lives.
Learn More About Becoming a Family Champion.
We are so thankful we switched because we now believe our fundraising and program goals are congruent – doing what is best for orphaned children, supporting their attachment to their caregivers so they have the best chance of experiencing God’s love in those relationships.
2024
Community Care in Kenyan Slums
A podcast with Hope’s Promise Kenya Country Coordinator, Steve Kariithi, in partnership with Think Global, Do Justice and Brandon Stiver.
We’re so excited to share this podcast with you! Steve talks with Brandon Stiver about what it looks like to do kinship based family care in Kenyan communities. They cover the effects of changing child welfare policy on families and juxtapose that with actions of the government that adversely affect families living in informal settlements. If you’ve ever wondered what it looks like to work in a slum, this is a good conversation to jump into.
Hope’s Promise is so thankful to have an advocate like Steve as a part of our international staff team
Listen here: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/think-global-do-justice/id1104078567?i=1000664469223
2024
Redemption in Choosing Adoption
Written by a Hope’s Promise Birth Mom.
It’s funny how a little plus sign can cause so much terror, anger, worry, disappointment, and fear. That little plus sign in that little window would change my life. How in the world did something like this happen to me at age 39? I mean…. I felt closer to menopause than childbearing age… but there I was… PREGNANT.
I had accepted many years ago that I would never be a mom. I was just not meant to experience pregnancy and childbirth and that love and connection with a little human being. I was in so much shock and disbelief. What was I going to do?
The next several months were a maze of crazy emotions, tears, fear, anger, frustration, and so much more. There was a little life living inside of me and abortion was never an option for me. I also knew I wasn’t in a place where I felt prepared or able to provide a life that this little one deserved.
I decided to choose adoption. I knew it was a miracle that I was pregnant, and God had an amazing plan for this little life. I knew this little one was going to make someone’s dreams come true (little did I know that mine were coming true too).
I was referred to an amazing adoption organization called Hope’s Promise. I set up an appointment with my caseworker. I was so scared to show up to that first meeting. I didn’t want to be judged or made to feel like I was worthless. And that was the last thing I ever felt with this organization. My caseworker, MaryBeth, made me feel so at ease as she shared her own adoption story with me.
At this point, I had a very hard heart and was so angry and disappointed in myself. When I first met with MaryBeth I planned on a fully closed adoption. I was going to carry this baby to term and have MaryBeth or a nurse hand this baby over to the adoptive couple that I was still yet to choose. I didn’t want to meet them or talk to them.
Slowly, as I continued to meet with MaryBeth, and through prayers by the staff at Hope’s Promise, and prayers of my mom and a couple of close friends, my heart slowly started to soften. I finally had the opportunity to look through 28 photobooks of families who wanted to adopt. I knew the moment I read the story of Samuel and Mary that they were the ones God had planned to parent this little life inside of me.
As more time went on and after Samuel and Mary were told that I had chosen them, they reached out and asked Mary Beth if they could write to me. At this point, my heart was softening, and I was open to some communication with them. They wrote me an amazing letter and I decided to write back. We exchanged a few letters and I finally decided that I needed to be the one to hand this baby over to them after the birth. I also decided that I wanted to meet them before the baby was born so that the time in the hospital was not awkward. The first time we met, my decision was confirmed. Samuel and Mary were hoping for an open adoption but wanted to respect my wishes for a closed adoption. God continued to work in me and change my heart. It wasn’t long before I changed my mind and decided that I wanted to see how this little one looked as he/she grew up. I wanted to know his/her personality.
On November 14th, at exactly 40 weeks, I was admitted to the hospital to be induced. After 56 hours of labor, I ended up with pre-eclampsia and the baby’s heart rate started to drop drastically. My nurse quickly called in my doctor and told them we needed to do an emergency C-section. Had it not been for this nurse, the baby and I would not have made it. My nurse is my hero! She will always have a special place in my life and heart. The doctor finally listened to her and I was rushed into the OR.
At 8:21 am on November 16, my sweet baby boy, Lukas Alexander, was born. He had a small puncture in his lung, the cord was wrapped around his neck and he wasn’t breathing. They had to do CPR but he did take his first breath and that little cry was the cutest cry I have ever heard. He was 6lbs, 2oz, and 20 inches long. He was perfect!
Later that day after I spent some time with Lukas, Samuel and Mary joined us in my room and met their son for the first time. They have renamed him Cole Samuel, and I love it!
I will always be a part of their lives. The connection we have is so deep and heartfelt. They have opened their hearts to me. We are all extended family. We get to figure this out together and we get to love Cole fiercely.
When I found out I was pregnant I didn’t plan on ever sharing my story but I am now so proud of my decision and that I am part of this amazing story. I feel so lucky that God allowed me to be a part of this. He can redeem any story for GOOD!!! I have been blessed by so many in this journey. I love all the ways God allows me to be used in Cole’s story. I have made amazing, lifelong friends through this journey and continue to make more as God allows me to be used for HIS glory.
2024
Give to Potential
When Steve Kariithi and other Hope’s Promise staff visited Grace Anglican, a church partner in Sheridan, WY, they connected with Crystal Merriam, church member and founder of a nonprofit called Lagniappe.